Do the right thing

For most of you this goes back to your childhood days when your guardians were trying to teach you a life-lesson by encouraging you to always do what was right. I’m not so sure we really teach that principle any longer or know what the current “right” (as in righteous thing) may be.

It appears that with time we have drifted from the clear-cut black and white differences to the various shades of gray. Society as an entity, especially in America, has metamorphosed into something totally different when it comes to “true” right or wrong. Many things today are permissible that were definitely wrong just a few years ago.

Back then the ones with the power of “the hammer” determined that distinction. By that I mean wherever the perceived threat of punishment rested was the hammer. With many it was with either mom or dad, if they were in the home. Since the institution of marriage has also transformed the traditional role of parents, they, in turn, have changed.

Where is the stability within society today? Where is the compass of true right or wrong? Is there even such a thing? Instead of “do the right thing,” the new paradigm these days seems to be “do your own thing.” Whatever one can get away with seems to be the new rule.

I admit that I did not always agree with the strictness of my guardians when I was a child. Very few enjoyed strict discipline and consequences when they were young. Knowing what you know now perhaps you realize that children don’t have enough wisdom in order to make the rules. Therefore it shouldn’t be up to them to determine what is right and wrong, or good and bad, not in the sense that they should have choices based upon their individual preferences.

Children have to be taught what is right or wrong by those who have the life experiences that come with wisdom and maturity. If we allow them to make such choices it would be like asking the blind to lead a new hiking expedition through a strange wilderness. Without the foresight and knowledge they have nothing to guide their choices.

In today’s society there seems to be a lackadaisical attitude about disciplining our children. Perhaps it may stem from our memories of our guardians being what we considered overly strict with us so we in turn lightened up on the next generation. Although many see this as doing them a favor, in truth it actually punishes them because they don’t get to learn clear boundaries. They feel empowered to do their own thing rather than following the established societal rules of law and order. That’s not good!

Unless you are very wealthy and powerful you will run into others that have the ability to force you against your will. They can make you do things that you would rather not do. If you don’t learn how to conform to boundaries or restrictions you have a rocky road ahead of you. Look at some of the very rich and powerful that are now incarcerated for their crimes. All their power and wealth could not override the even more powerful justice system.

Although doing the right thing does not guarantee fame, success, or happiness, it does increase your odds of living cohesively and at peace with the elements around you, while going against them increases your chances of facing consequences beyond your will.

Unfortunately, and especially when it comes to children, doing the right thing is no longer considered to be a thing of honor. In fact you are criticized more for doing right than for being one of the bad boys or girls, in certain settings.

How do we re-calibrate this moral compass?

Firstly, doing the right thing needs to become a habit. It needs to be instinctual so that as the situation or circumstances arise you almost automatically respond in the manner in which you were trained. This is key to most of our human endeavors. We must train ourselves in the ways that we wish to operate so as we go about living our lives that training becomes the immediate action and /or reaction. This usually requires a conscious effort with much practice, many trials, and even errors.

Obviously if we train our children in the ways of right living that training normally stays with them as they mature: It becomes part of who they are. Without any training there are no guidelines to help a person stay within boundaries.

Secondly we have to handle our human nature. Many times we do wrong things while knowing we are crossing a line. We willingly do things that we fully realize to be wrong. Why? We do it because our nature often compels us to do so.

I might over-eat, drink excessively, drive while intoxicated, cheat on someone that trusted in me, make harsh remarks about others, take something that does not belong to me, or commit a number of acts and deeds that I know to be wrong. In order to correct such behaviors I must first have the desire to change and then put practices in place that will help me modify my infractions. The key here is having the desire to do right that is stronger than the desire to do wrong.

Somehow as we mature these lines become increasingly clear. Perhaps the desire to do wrong, "just for the hell of it”, diminishes somewhat. It may also be because you realize that there is no real or lasting gratification in doing wrong. It could also be because a person gets more spiritual or religious and becomes more conscious of their sinful or evil behaviors.

The bottom line is that it is always the best choice to do the right thing, even when your human nature tempts you to do otherwise. This was equally true when you were a bit more mischievous as a child.

It matters not what others choose to do and why they make such choices, but as for you personally, you must desire to do what is right and decent before you become right and decent. Whenever possible, and it is always possible, do what you know to be the right thing. Your soul will thank you later.